Whenever a tragedy strikes, it has become customary for gofundme.com campaigns to be set up to help the victims.
People battling serious illness, families left in dire circumstances because of the sudden death of a loved one, those who lose their homes to fire or other disasters – all have been helped by the now ubiquitous fundraising campaigns.
But a perusal of all the campaigns launched in Sudbury in recent years shows not all of them are created equal and some fall well short of their fundraising goals.
However, some people are able to raise a surprising amount of money for some, let's say, alternative causes.
One fundraiser, launched last December sought $305 to help a young Sudbury man pay for a littering ticket. It seems he flicked a cigarette butt outside his school.
“Unfortunately, a tobacco bylaw officer hopped out of her car and gave me a hefty fine,” the campaign post reads.
He managed to raise $109, which he said in an email Monday was donated by friends and he returned the money to them. The campaign was a joke, he wrote, and he paid the fine himself.
Another, year-old campaign seeks to raise $4,000 for a group called the Authentian Church, which appears to mix God and marijuana.
“This campaign is to grow with fellowship with other open minded people with faith, and teach responsibility for God's plant of cannabis, in an affirming respectful church community,” the post says. “This campaign is branded for office supplies, bible studying materials, and pay for some assistance with church community. and also raise some money for part time faith based videos.”
So far, the group has raised $30 of its $4,000 goal.
Keeping with the quasi-religious theme, another campaign is looking for $6,000 so a local woman can get her master's degree in something called Theta healing.
“How much fun can I cocreate with my friends, what would it take for me to generate my tuition for the Intuitive Anatomy Instructors Course in Montana,” the post reads. “It takes a special kind of crazy person to want to teach it and travel to places where people want to learn it. I will Namasplay it forward.”
According to the website, thetahealing.com, the goal is this: “We believe by changing your brain wave cycle to include the 'Theta' state, you can actually watch the Creator Of All That Is create instantaneous physical and emotional wellbeing. We have learned that through the ThetaHealing Technique intuitive abilities can be used to bring about spontaneous physical and emotional well-being.”
Launched last week, it sits at $35.
One campaign that has done surprisingly well sought to raise $500 so someone could buy enough whiskey to drink every time a Leafs player scored in this year's NHL playoffs. The team was eliminated in the first round, but the campaign attracted $120 nonetheless.
Another campaign asks Sudburians to consider the plight of 'Jay Jay Fann,' who is looking for $7,000 to pay for surgery to increase the size of her gluteus maximus.
“I'm tired of being told I have a flat butt and being made fun of, and not feeling attractive,” the post reads. “I've tried to fix it the conventional way. And it hasn't worked. Genetics aren't on my side. I have started saving on my own. But anything would help! Please help me feel beautiful!”
No contributions have been made in the two months the campaign has been active.
Other local campaigns that have failed to attract donations include a 21-year-old student looking for money for a party trip to Las Vegas, a month-old campaign looking for $15 so someone can buy a Fortnite season pass, another launched this month looking for $1,000 to buy Fortnite skins, and, on a smaller scale, a $10 campaign to fund a funeral for 50cent, the name of someone's late goldfish.
“Your funeral is gonna be the most lit celebration ever because that’s what you would’ve wanted,” the post reads.
But those pale in comparison to something called the Earth Engine, described as a way to build a better future.
“I need your help to patent and create never-before-seen ways of making food/water/electricity and jobs,” the post says.
The two-week old campaign has yet to get a donation toward its $100,000 goal. That's a modest amount compared to the $1 million sought by a man who wants to “date around the world.
“Anything is possible right?” the post says.
